SPSFC3 First Phase Mini Reviews
Siphon: Power Comes with a Price
by Jason Fox
My Vote:
No
Note on Votes: A Yes/No vote is just my own. The other judges in the team might vote differently. Undecided usually means I think it has potential but I still have others to read before ranking them by personal preference.
Summary:
Siphon (At ~19% read) is a story about an alien child called Apollo born to a human mother. I can’t really tell you more than that at this stage of the story. The child has only just been born but it’s clear it’s a tale about Apollo, a humanoid being with great strength and power and going by the title the entrapment that can lead to. What we get at the ~20% mark is the perspective first from the mother about how the child was conceived up to the birth, then to the head doctor of the hospital followed by an FBI special agent sent to investigate. I’m not sure if we’ll see things from Apollo’s POV or just keep moving between characters that come and go from Apollo’s life. Which I find an interesting Approach. Authors tend to shy away from focusing on temporary characters. It’s rare to see stories structured this way and I find it refreshing.
Overall impression & Criticisms:
One thing I really like (At least at this point) is that most of the characters are older than typical. They’re Middle-aged and passed (or moving past) their prime. Again, it’s a welcome shift in perspective.
But the greatest thing that bothered me and continuously nudges me as I read is that the characters are all a bit bland and boring. They are a bit wooden and feel like many of them have the same voice. For example at the hospital we are introduced to a doctor who runs things, upon observing the child and its strange powers he instantly comes to two possibilities: either the child is a mutant or it’s an alien. Then later we are introduced to the special agent and the moment he also sees the baby he too comes to the exact same conclusions, there on the spot. There are no other possibilities with either, no divine provenance, no robotic trickery, no other possibilities. And neither of them have any uncertainty in their conclusion — or just uncertainty in general. They both in essence felt like the exact same person. And this is a problem with almost all characters, larger or minor. I don’t really feel like I’m reading different people. Their only defining qualities seem to be appearance and occupation.
It makes me feel like I’m just reading the author’s thoughts rather than the characters and it breaks the immersion somewhat. Of course one can argue any book is ultimately an author’s thoughts, but the art is into tricking us into thinking these are real, individual people.
The one time we are introduced to anyone with any sense of a distinct personality we are then later introduced to two more characters that feel the same – the thing in common with these three people. They’re all scientists/experts/nerd types, and they all have glasses. Yeah, it’s a little bit grating.
But even with this issue I am still somewhat immersed in the story. I don’t know why, it feels like nothing new. Getting the “what if Superman was found by the government” vibes. But none-the-less I’m drawn in and want to read more, perhaps because the author has gone in a direction that I haven’t come across since the golden age of science fiction writing, it’s a modern, super like story, but written with an old recipe from the 1950s. Most stories that have been done before usually hold their own because of their unique characters and writing style, so perhaps it’s just the wanting to know how the author tackles the following chapters that has enticed me. The concern there of course is I grow bored and it stops capturing my interest.
Another issue is more in the formatting side (for all I know it could just be the file I have and not an issue with anyone else) – and that sometimes there’s a scene change but instead of a space between paragraphs it’s just a new paragraph following on from the last. It’s very confusing when I stumble across it. I’ll be reading a scene and then all of a sudden I’m someplace else at some other time and I have to stop and go back and re-read again. So just a note, be a bit careful with breaking up paragraphs. Make it clear somehow when there’s a shift.
To the story – without knowing how the rest plays out I can’t help but think what the father alien was thinking. There’s lots of questions on my side about these choices. Seems like a masochist to me. Warning SPOILERS – the start of the story follows the chance meeting between a human-looking alien and a waitress in the middle of nowhere. They have a bit of a chat, it’s a bit amusing and a bit frustrating on my side. But they get into a little hanky panky and he goes on his way again. The suggestion is that he isn’t too sure how it would turn out. But given the amazing powers he possessed I’m sure the outcome was destined to be a disaster for the waitress, unless he was hoping the child would be more human than “Whatever he is” – but this leads to several other questions, like how is the pregnancy even humanly possible? Is the alien a parasitic species? Are they a type of human? The aliens clearly have rules that this guy ignores, do we ever find out why? Such as past unions resulting in myths and legends like Hercules/Sampson etc? … could be fun and I hope it’s explored, but I get the feeling that part of the story was done and any chance of deeper lore is gone with it … but I can still hope.
